Wednesday, February 6, 2013

i see london, i see france...

So with my gym membership I got a "complimentary physical assessment." 

To be read as: "make an appointment to walk talk with a good-looking person who knows more about physical fitness than you, knows how much you weigh and how much of your body is FAT and tries to get you to pay more money to us...assessment."

While informative, enlightening, and also disgusting (my body fat percentage....eww), I think I will be going it alone. No biggie. 

I am a loner and not much of a people person anyway. *gasp!*

So since I had no appropriate clothing for the gym, I headed to Plato's Closet to find some pants that would work. Since I knew I was going to the gym before I did my laundry, I kept on pair out to use first. 

This is relevant because as I was stretching, I had a terrifying thought. 

I was doing the 'butterfly' stretch- the one where you put the sole of your feet together and press down on your knees - As I did this, I was on mat positioned right in front of a full basketball court and weight 'room' area. 

I realized that there may be a huge gaping hole in the crotch. Thankfully, there was not, but what if? I couldn't very well check it. And given my newly acquired knowledge of my body fat percentage, I knew why I couldn't just to a bendy stretch and look. 

Couldn't very well feel around either - that would almost be worse than flashing bright orange undies to the gym. 

So, no hole. Thank goodness. Just thought I would share. Now you know I really am going to the gym. Feel free to join me!


Sarah said...

That was funny. Glad there was no hole in your pants! Good luck on taking your health back. I think every person on Josh's side of the family has or had diabetes- It's a scary thing!

Anna said...

I can barely type this as I am laughing so hard! Well written and absolutely HILARIOUS!!! Thanks for the laugh!

Bethany said...

Oh, my, gosh! I could hear your voice as I was reading this. You are too funny. One more reason not to hit the gym. :)